I know what most of you are going to say, and I hear it all the time: “Sharks are soooo scary” (insert my eye roll here). There are a lot of reasons (mostly unfounded) that people are afraid of sharks, and if you’re one of them, you are completely entitled to your wrong opinion (ha!). Sharks may be a little scary, but they are crucial to the eco system and there are some sharks that are close to being endangered. But no need to fear, I’m here to educate and entertain you with the top reasons why I love sharks.
They’re Kind of a BIG deal
Sharks are the Ron Burgundy of the ocean and they basically dominate. The biggest fish in the ocean just happens to be a gentle giant, also known as a Whale Shark. But don’t worry, Whale Sharks won’t hurt you and they are quite beautiful. On top of the food chain is obviously the Great White Shark, known for picking fights with whales and dolphins. And Bull Sharks can live in salt water or fresh water and have been found up and down the Mississippi River. I know this is getting all sentimental. But Sharks are kinda beautiful (ok, most of them). They have this certain je ne sais quoi and they just swim around owning the place, it’s like their personal motto is “hey everyone, come see how good I look”.
They Have Freaking Laser Beams
Ok, they don’t really have laser beams, but they do have electroreceptors that help them hunt and ‘sniff out’ their prey which is equally as cool. And there is totally a different type of shark for everyone. Don’t like sharks with teeth that can bite you in a million pieces? That’s cool, check out a Nurse Shark, they aren’t too scary. Or maybe you’re looking for an extremely ugly shark to star in your next horror film like the Goblin Shark (one of my personal favorites). If cooking is more your speed, there is even a Cookie Cutter Shark out there for you! There are 440 known shark species so I’m confident there is a shark worth loving out there.
May the Force Be With You
Ok, I know whales do the whole breach thing, but that’s so expected! Great White’s literally jump out of the water with a g force of 4. If that’s not cool, I don’t know what is. Spinner Sharks also leap into the air showing off their John Travolta dance moves to impress the ladies. Thrasher sharks will thrash the tail around like the Hammer of Thor to break up bait balls and eat the weaklings. Maybe you think sharks are on the Dark Side, but I think there’s still hope.
So You’re Telling me There’s a Chance?
Ok yes, there is a chance you could be bit. But Lloyd has a better chance getting with Mary than you do of getting bit by a shark. As a mater of fact, the odds of getting bit are 1 in 3,748,067. But let’s be real, sharks don’t want to eat you, you’re not that tasty and you certainly aren’t filling. Sharks are picky eaters. How many times has someone placed some new food in front of you and said ‘try it’ (probably my scariest food phrase). If you’re like me, there is no commitment, I may try to smell it first, but I always take the smallest bite possible. And if I like it, then I’ll go in for the kill (see what I did there). Well sharks are similar, they are going to investigate, and their first bite is typically a taste test.
Say “hello” to my little friend!
Sharks have these fish that follow them around called Remora’s. They are basically like the annoying sidekick that follows you around but comes in handy now and then. The Remora’s will clean the sharks teeth but eating the leftovers. And if you think sharks are scary, remoras have even been known to bite humans in a true version of what I like to call ‘small fish syndrome’.
You Can’t Handle the Truth!
And the truth is, sharks are awesome. But don’t just take my word for it, but you probably should!